Deep within you lurks a killer. A wild man, sweaty from the hunt, caked in the dried blood of his last kill. He’s the Caveman, and he’s in your DNA. Actually, let’s not call it DNA – let’s call it blood. Thick, gloopy red BLOOD. He’d prefer that. Occasionally you’ll become aware of the primitive within.

It happened to me today.

I slept at my brother’s last night, and this morning I had to use his towel. I say ‘had to’ but I was glad to… because as I stood there drying my balls with his towel, the Caveman appeared out of the shower’s steam (I may have made the steam up to make it feel a bit more dramatic).

The experience of using another man’s towel kind of delighted the primitive within. The bit of me that’s happier in the trees, covered in mud as opposed to the sanitised, “now wash your hands”, single-use, sterile world we live in.

The moment was a reminder of something Real. Of Flesh, Skin, Scent, Sweat – the things we cover up and disguise. And then I wondered why? Is it to distance us from the other animals? To convince us that we’re something pure, after all ‘Cleanliness is next to Godliness!’

And when did we stop sharing towels? Did a particularly vicious bout of crabs do the rounds in the changing cave at Mudchester United Rockball team?

I’m not saying we need to walk around stinking, covered in filth. It’s just good to be reminded of what we’re made of, and if it takes the scent of another man being rubbed all over my body, then so be it. I AM MAN!

Perhaps for you, you’ll get a flash-back of life in the trees when you next bite into a succulent nectarine and let the syrupy, sticky juice roll down your chin and shirt (or better yet – your naked chest). Or maybe it will be a beautiful woman gliding past that stirs the savage with-in… especially is she’s wearing leopard print.

Next time the Caveman cometh, don’t dismiss him as a savage brute who only thinks with his cock and talks with his hands, consider his understanding of the world, of reality, and that he’s programmed for survival… He’s got your back.

Let us know when the Caveman next appears for you.